Saturday, May 9, 2015

If You Don't Grow, You Die

By now, most of you know Aniqah Khalid, one of my best friends and fellow writers. Usually she guest posts content she hasn't published before on my blog, but I absolutely LOVED her most recent post, and so I had to have it too! Enjoy. 

Today, on the 7th of May 2015, I have decided to embrace life and fight for my happiness and I would like all of you struggling to do this with me too. For three years, my life has been a downward spiral of anxieties, depression, negativity, paranoia and just everything wrong. I have decided to put an end to this and I have recently learned through a life changing video by Mimi Ikonn that you have to invest in sustainability. There is no magic pill where you wake up one day and everything is completely fine. You have to TRY and work at your salvation. Her tips are the ones I will share below and I challenge everyone who is mildly or severely unhappy to partake in this happiness challenge with me for a month and see how we feel by the end of it. However, we must be dedicated and work at this daily and united, and give this our absolute all. It is time to step up and fight for our happy ever afters.
1) Every morning we must CHOOSE to be happy. Life is a simple matter of attitude and outlook. Everyday we must slowly work our minds and shape them to see everything in a more positive and holistic way. Be disgustingly grateful for every small thing and hopefully make it become second nature to us.
2) It’s time to give the negative people in our life the axe. I have started doing that where I am focusing wholeheartedly on positive, inspiring, happy and focused people. You do not need the extra negativity, dealing with ourselves is hard enough, having to deal with external negativity is absolutely unnecessary. Moreover, apart from our friends and acquaintances, let us now surround ourselves with positive reading, be it books or blogs and positive entertainment; ted talks, motivational speakers, bloggers and vloggers, F.R.I.E.N.D.S and whatever makes you happy!
3) One of the things Mimi mentioned is to not watch the news. As a blogger and budding journalist this is something I was quite reluctant to try out. But the more I thought about it the more it struck me that indeed the news is so unbelievably depressing. Is it true that we should not keep a blind eye and be more compassionate to humanity, but how are you of any help to humanity where you are emotionally and mentally unstable? Help and sort yourself out first. News does indeed depress me and if there is something big that happens one is bound to definitely hear about it, but for now let us try focus on the positives happening out there.
4) It’s time to jump into the meditation pool. I find mediation extremely hard because when I focus on my mind and body they begin to play tricks on me which feeds my anxiety. However, it is not meant to be easy when you begin, but as you work at it the effects begin to pay off. It is scientifically proven that meditation produces parasympathetic healing and it is even used for healing physically and mentally ill patients. Furthermore, I have seen a first hand experience of how mediation changes a persons life through my best-friend Gurkiran. She has become a completely different girl; her outlook, mindset and mannerisms are totally different and it all stemmed from mediation. It is also a practice of many religions which is also clear evidence of how important it is. In Islam our prayers work to meditate our minds where there is only you, your soul and your Lord. I aim to try meditation at least once a day and I will come back with results.
5) Let us self reflect. I usually do this in a more “what is wrong with me?” manner. I have realized that that is definitely not a right approach. What we must do is to condition the mind to focus on the positives around us. My mind begins working when I am about to fall asleep, at that point why do I not think about all the little amazing things that happen to me during the day and scream ALLHAMDILLULAH in my heart? It’s time we change our brain wiring before it’s too late.
6) I find myself becoming day by day an emotionless stone. According to Mimi one of the underrated keys to being happy is giving out hugs. She recommends five but I am going to try three. I know this sounds utterly absurd but apparently this enhances happiness so I am going to try whatever it takes.
7) It is also time for us to start expressing our love. We are missing out on what all of these other happy twits feel when they are all mushy and lovey dovey to the people they love. I have a feeling this will greatly change our lives in more ways than we expect. This doesn’t mean just saying you love your mum, this also includes selfless acts of kindness-it’s time to tap into our unconditional love box and start thinking about others as well.
8) Let's be okay with not being 100% okay, or happy, or ‘normal’. We make a big deal about how we are feeling and we always want to figure out why. We need to learn to accept that this is a hardship and a test, and this too shall pass. In previous generations anxieties and depression were unheard of because people would understand that life most certainly has its highs and lows.
9) It is important to understand that how you are feeling is your body or soul trying to tell you to make a change. I believe that my soul is trying to tell me to respond to my religious calling. To fall in love with my faith and rediscover my creator. In other words I think I am unhappy because I am not a good Muslim and I have decided that it is finally time to change that. You need to know what it is that is bothering you and you must make the change whether its your diet, your lifestyle, your relationship, your faith or anything in your life bringing you down.
10) The last point is to have a purpose. You need to do something for yourself- we need to set challenging goals and get out of our comfort zones. When I used to hear of ‘growth’, I never fully understood it, but now I understand that growing means finding your life purpose and becoming a better person. If you do not grow you die. That was slowly happening to me which is why I have decided to take and make the change. It is time to believe in our purpose.
I am going to practice all ten points every single day till the 7th of June where I am hoping to report back a completely different person and I am greatly hoping to make these habits part of my daily routine forever. I call on everyone to partake in this challenge with me, and I would love to hear about how you are coping and if this is helping you at all. Happiness is now ours for the taking, we just have to want it that bad.
behappy

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